请帮我看下这篇英语作文，哪里能修改哪里能改进。谢谢！

1. The picture is show 有语法问题，改成：The picture shows

2. Home's dinner改成：family dinner

3. all the family sitting around the desk 却动词，另外吃饭用的桌子一般用table. 所以改成：all the family members are sitting around the table

4. although the has 改成：although there is a lot of food o the table.

5. 直接说：all the tennage are playing the cell phones.

6. There are happy when they watch the screen---they are

7. I am guilt----I feel guilty

8. I play the ---I also play the telephone at dinner

9. a good dinner is...-----------A good dinner atmosphere shall be all the family members talking to each other and all of them should be happy.

太多要改的了。

• the picture shows...

• all the family members are sitting around the desk

• although there are so many kinds of food in the table

• teenagers are all playing the telephone

• they look happy when they are playing it

• the grandparents

• i feel guilty when i...

• i play ....during the dinner

• a good dinner is every members in the family talk to each other.

• making our life be more interesting

• then, if someone use the ...untrue

• I suggest that people should ride out thevirtual when they are doing something like making a dinner

• talking to parents

  能选我的为最佳答案吗？ 我有个很急的问题要问，但没分了！！！

你的图片我看着不是很清楚呢，简单的说一下吧.
First,in the beginning of your writting,you can describe something about the current about the eletronic product development.In the second part,as the picture showing , describe as detailed as you can .
Next,Remember summarize an idea in your opinon including the effect of the situation.